Toyosu Photo Walk
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183)
Fri 2008/11/21 20:24
Its a lovely evening so thought we would go walkies around the Lalaport area at Toyosu - a nice place for shopping, food and an evening stroll.
While we're out n about, I thought we'd have the usual chit chat. Tonight I'd like to talk about 'haters'. I've encountered quite a few in my time and you may have too.
While we're out n about, I thought we'd have the usual chit chat. Tonight I'd like to talk about 'haters'. I've encountered quite a few in my time and you may have too.
Haters are folks who hate your very existence for no apparent reason. There you are just minding your own business when a hater appears and starts to do or say things that get on your nut. I used to get depressed by these folks for a while until I realized that they all were a piece of the jigsaw puzzle that was needed to get me to where I am now. We actually need haters.
I'm going to talk about two particular haters and how they indirectly helped me.
One was a half Korean/Japanese classmate at university who was native-ish Japanese but didn't learn Korean as a child.
During class I spoke to him as a friend but learned from others how he would suddenly bring up the subject of "Hey you know that Danny? He's such an idiot. Why does he need to learn Korean?" I was surprised to learn how much he hated me!
One day in class, while I was struggling reading some Korean text, he suddenly stood up in class and shouted (in Japanese) "Look! Why don't you just study more! You are keeping the whole class behind!"
The experience left me embarrassed and shaking with anger. It's an experience that I don't purposely choose to remember but can recall it like it was yesterday. I read somewhere that emotional experiences can be easily recalled because when one is emotional, some sort of hormone is released which makes it easier to remember experiences and fixes that time and space in memory - this is the reason why most of your emotional memories (sorrow, happiness, anger) can be replayed clearly. Me not an expert on the subject or terminology though.
One was a half Korean/Japanese classmate at university who was native-ish Japanese but didn't learn Korean as a child.
During class I spoke to him as a friend but learned from others how he would suddenly bring up the subject of "Hey you know that Danny? He's such an idiot. Why does he need to learn Korean?" I was surprised to learn how much he hated me!
One day in class, while I was struggling reading some Korean text, he suddenly stood up in class and shouted (in Japanese) "Look! Why don't you just study more! You are keeping the whole class behind!"
The experience left me embarrassed and shaking with anger. It's an experience that I don't purposely choose to remember but can recall it like it was yesterday. I read somewhere that emotional experiences can be easily recalled because when one is emotional, some sort of hormone is released which makes it easier to remember experiences and fixes that time and space in memory - this is the reason why most of your emotional memories (sorrow, happiness, anger) can be replayed clearly. Me not an expert on the subject or terminology though.
Was depressed about the experience but the sadness and anger wasn't doing me any good. I decided to use that energy instead to focus on improving my Korean just as the guy suggested. Spent every ounce of my time learning new grammar patterns and absorbing myself in the language just like I did when learning Japanese. A few weeks after the experience, my effort was beginning to pay off.
The teacher would basically be going over grammar patterns from the textbook that we done homework from but I made sure that I studied a few chapters ahead and also made the use of other text books.
I would be asked to complete a sentence using some new grammar pattern but I would always use new stuff which I studied on my own.
"Very good! Danny! Chal Haesumnida! Everybody, repeat after Danny..." I felt like a kid back in primary school being praised by the teacher for being able to spell "d-o-l-p-h-i-n."
That guys face would stiffen up and turn bright red as he clenched his pen which dug deep into his notebook and I made sure that he didn't have the pleasure of me not looking at him. I guess those who laugh last really do laugh the longest.
The teacher would basically be going over grammar patterns from the textbook that we done homework from but I made sure that I studied a few chapters ahead and also made the use of other text books.
I would be asked to complete a sentence using some new grammar pattern but I would always use new stuff which I studied on my own.
"Very good! Danny! Chal Haesumnida! Everybody, repeat after Danny..." I felt like a kid back in primary school being praised by the teacher for being able to spell "d-o-l-p-h-i-n."
That guys face would stiffen up and turn bright red as he clenched his pen which dug deep into his notebook and I made sure that he didn't have the pleasure of me not looking at him. I guess those who laugh last really do laugh the longest.
The next hater was a lovely piece of work. We were both hired at the same time and he was chosen to be my boss. Everything seemed to be going well until we started to work with each other. He didn't have any previous management experience and took the "I'm-your-boss-so-shut-up-and-listen-to-what-I-say" model. I had just started out in my career and was fine with that and had no problem with taking orders.
I've always been the one to take initiative and tend to do stuff which I think will benefit the company even though its not necessarily in my job description.
My boss however was the type who just wanted to get work done and go home. He really had no passion for what he was doing. I initially heard him arguing with the General Manager that 7,000,000 yen wasn't enough to support himself, his wife and two kids. I'm guessing that he felt his pay didn't cover managing a subordinate who wanted to do stuff outside his job description.
One day, after reporting back to him on a project that the General Manager was pleased with, he slammed his fists on my desk and shouted "Stop Fu*cking wasting my fu*cking time!" - it was another one of those "in-front-of-everybody-(including-the-cute-office-ladies)" thing. I remember blood rushing to my head and feeling dizzy after. Never been so humiliated in my life. The office was silent and the air tense with the other employees not knowing how to react. I was in tears.
I've always been the one to take initiative and tend to do stuff which I think will benefit the company even though its not necessarily in my job description.
My boss however was the type who just wanted to get work done and go home. He really had no passion for what he was doing. I initially heard him arguing with the General Manager that 7,000,000 yen wasn't enough to support himself, his wife and two kids. I'm guessing that he felt his pay didn't cover managing a subordinate who wanted to do stuff outside his job description.
One day, after reporting back to him on a project that the General Manager was pleased with, he slammed his fists on my desk and shouted "Stop Fu*cking wasting my fu*cking time!" - it was another one of those "in-front-of-everybody-(including-the-cute-office-ladies)" thing. I remember blood rushing to my head and feeling dizzy after. Never been so humiliated in my life. The office was silent and the air tense with the other employees not knowing how to react. I was in tears.
Feeling sorry for myself wasn't doing any good so I started to look for solutions. By this time, I had also felt that I was outgrowing my role and It was a small company. I soon realized that I needed to explore opportunities outside.
I started to meet with recruiters who introduced me to many companies. Meeting with these folks helped me grow quickly. My network started to grow over night and I also learned many interviewee techniques. For job positions which I've turned down, the prospective employer would always want to keep in touch. I still keep in touch with recruiters/head hunters and some of them still ask me if I'm available or know somebody who is ^^;
I also started to learn what my market value was given my skills and experience. Knowing your market value is essential in making a successful career for yourself.
In the end, I had placed myself in a different company but before I left my current company, they fired my boss - not only for treating me like poo on the shoe but also for several other counts of professional misconduct.
I was young at the time and while I knew I was outgrowing my role, I didn't take initiative to look for external opportunities until indirectly pushed by my lovely boss. I thank him for being a piece of my life jigsaw puzzle.
In the end, I had placed myself in a different company but before I left my current company, they fired my boss - not only for treating me like poo on the shoe but also for several other counts of professional misconduct.
I was young at the time and while I knew I was outgrowing my role, I didn't take initiative to look for external opportunities until indirectly pushed by my lovely boss. I thank him for being a piece of my life jigsaw puzzle.
These days however, my haters are mostly of the online variety.
My theories as to why folks start to hate you are:-
- Human instinct is to protect him/herself. You see this reaction if somebody falls over - their arms naturally extend to protect them from the fall. If a human feels threatened by your existence, they may try to harm you directly or indirectly.
- Humans with low self esteem may find that attacking you makes them feel better about themselves as it 'places them above you.' I notice this *a lot* on the Japanese Internet. Many folks in Japanese society are given the "I'm-your-boss-so-shut-up-and-listen-to-what-I-say" treatment - needless to say that they feel like poo on the shoe when they get home. They then proceed to take it out on people/companies on the Internet with foul language. This form of gang bashing is known as "Matsuri" which literally means "Festival" - a group of folks having a good time bashing others.
- Many humans hate the unknown. And because something is unknown, the only means a hater has to protect themselves is hatred which they try to use to expel you.
I also personally experienced this form of hatred at school too. I lived many of my years bullied by a particular person - the guy who I mentioned before who wanted to smash my head in with a metal bat. I was a quiet weak child who was brought up with foster parents who bullied me at home too - didn't exactly leave me feeling confident at school. Haters took advantage of this fact to make them feel better about themselves.
- Some humans may 'blame' you for how well you are doing at school or in society and see you as the cause of their current predicaments. You do well because of your hard work while others want your abilities (or what you have) by doing nothing. Jealousy is a trait that can even be seen in animals but if they could learn how to feel good about themselves, they need not be jealous of anything or anybody.
- Some humans hate you for not being how they want you to be. In their mind they have already decided how certain sets of humans should behave and when you are being just you and not behaving as they expect, they will hate you because you are not meeting their expectations. They could possibly see this as a threat to them because they don't know how to handle people who are not in their presets.
- Another reason why humans may choose you as a target of hatred is because they use you as a benchmark to 'do better' than you. This is annoying and a compliment at the same time ^^; I see this going on between companies. A particular company that I worked at hated another company and used them as a benchmark.
- Some humans may hate you due to some sort of misunderstanding. I always employ and encourage open communication especially for sensitive topics. If the hater is somebody you care about, take the initiative to try to find out the cause of you being hated as it could be something over something very silly indeed.
My theories as to why folks start to hate you are:-
- Human instinct is to protect him/herself. You see this reaction if somebody falls over - their arms naturally extend to protect them from the fall. If a human feels threatened by your existence, they may try to harm you directly or indirectly.
- Humans with low self esteem may find that attacking you makes them feel better about themselves as it 'places them above you.' I notice this *a lot* on the Japanese Internet. Many folks in Japanese society are given the "I'm-your-boss-so-shut-up-and-listen-to-what-I-say" treatment - needless to say that they feel like poo on the shoe when they get home. They then proceed to take it out on people/companies on the Internet with foul language. This form of gang bashing is known as "Matsuri" which literally means "Festival" - a group of folks having a good time bashing others.
- Many humans hate the unknown. And because something is unknown, the only means a hater has to protect themselves is hatred which they try to use to expel you.
I also personally experienced this form of hatred at school too. I lived many of my years bullied by a particular person - the guy who I mentioned before who wanted to smash my head in with a metal bat. I was a quiet weak child who was brought up with foster parents who bullied me at home too - didn't exactly leave me feeling confident at school. Haters took advantage of this fact to make them feel better about themselves.
- Some humans may 'blame' you for how well you are doing at school or in society and see you as the cause of their current predicaments. You do well because of your hard work while others want your abilities (or what you have) by doing nothing. Jealousy is a trait that can even be seen in animals but if they could learn how to feel good about themselves, they need not be jealous of anything or anybody.
- Some humans hate you for not being how they want you to be. In their mind they have already decided how certain sets of humans should behave and when you are being just you and not behaving as they expect, they will hate you because you are not meeting their expectations. They could possibly see this as a threat to them because they don't know how to handle people who are not in their presets.
- Another reason why humans may choose you as a target of hatred is because they use you as a benchmark to 'do better' than you. This is annoying and a compliment at the same time ^^; I see this going on between companies. A particular company that I worked at hated another company and used them as a benchmark.
- Some humans may hate you due to some sort of misunderstanding. I always employ and encourage open communication especially for sensitive topics. If the hater is somebody you care about, take the initiative to try to find out the cause of you being hated as it could be something over something very silly indeed.
My observations of haters are:-
- Haters linger - they want to know what you are doing/saying and this probably goes back to my theory of them perceiving you as a threat. If you are online, they will visit your site regularly and if your hater is a real life offline hater then they will try to find out what you are up to - could be through mutual friends.
- I have come across many haters who start to believe that things you say or do is directed at them. My theory is that they either want you to acknowledge the hatred that they have for you or gain sympathy or recognition from peers - they so this by picking out something you say or do and believe it is directed at them somehow. This probably makes them feel special which could stem from them blaming you for their current position or situation in society.
- Haters will let as many people as possible know how much they hate you. My theory is that they try to recruit the sympathy of fellows which makes them feel wanted and recognized.
- Online haters never use their real name - they usually hide behind an online identity. Being 'invisible' means that a hater can poke n tease at you without you knowing who they are and this may give them extreme heightened levels of pleasure which may make up for their distress at their current predicament in society.
- People who are initially friends can become your best haters. I have experienced this behavior on and offline. I had a few previous colleagues who started off being friendly and turning into monsters! But at the same time, I knew initial haters who turned out to be incredibly good buddies too.
- Haters linger - they want to know what you are doing/saying and this probably goes back to my theory of them perceiving you as a threat. If you are online, they will visit your site regularly and if your hater is a real life offline hater then they will try to find out what you are up to - could be through mutual friends.
- I have come across many haters who start to believe that things you say or do is directed at them. My theory is that they either want you to acknowledge the hatred that they have for you or gain sympathy or recognition from peers - they so this by picking out something you say or do and believe it is directed at them somehow. This probably makes them feel special which could stem from them blaming you for their current position or situation in society.
- Haters will let as many people as possible know how much they hate you. My theory is that they try to recruit the sympathy of fellows which makes them feel wanted and recognized.
- Online haters never use their real name - they usually hide behind an online identity. Being 'invisible' means that a hater can poke n tease at you without you knowing who they are and this may give them extreme heightened levels of pleasure which may make up for their distress at their current predicament in society.
- People who are initially friends can become your best haters. I have experienced this behavior on and offline. I had a few previous colleagues who started off being friendly and turning into monsters! But at the same time, I knew initial haters who turned out to be incredibly good buddies too.
So how about me? Who do I hate? Well I used to hate Ichiro (yes Ichiro ^^;) after I saw a clip on TV of him being horrible to fans who traveled to Seattle from Japan to see him. I feel like a complete pratt thinking that I used to hate somebody who is so far away from me and who I don't even know. I don't hate anybody these days because hating people does not really do anything for me. Hating somebody uses up time and some form of life energy which I would rather be using to focus on my own life.
So what should you do about that person at school or work that hates you for no apparent reason? Well there is a reason they hate you but its probably because you are just being yourself and you should never have to change yourself to please them. I tried to change myself to please my bullies by asking them to punch me - they punched but I was never part of their clan and glad I didn't end up like them. Many of my 'friends' ended up turning to the dark side of the force and bullied me to be part of the clan. They never studied and many of them started to do badly in their studies.
If you are on the end of being hated, have a look at some of the reasons above and hopefully there will be some comments of advice too which will help you deal with your situation. You should continue to focus on the things that you need to do that contributes to *your* life. Its still day one for all of us and we are always learning and growing in this game of life. Haters may initially get on your nut but should realize that they are there for a reason and that fate has made them into a piece of your jigsaw puzzle that slowly gets completed as you go through life.
Society has all walks of people and we would never be able to successfully get through life without experiencing haters and learning how to deal with them. Remember that we need haters to help us grow and that they are in your life for a reason. You must work out what that reason is and learn how to deal with them. By understanding that its most probably because they are jealous, scared or need attention will help you define how to deal with them.
What you must not do is spend large amounts of time worrying or thinking about the people who hate you. This is your life and not theirs. You should not waste your precious life on people who hate you and focus on your beautiful life that you have ahead of you.
If you are happy, passionate about what you do and enjoying the variety of life then you will realize how insignificant haters are compared to the wonderful life you have.
So what should you do about that person at school or work that hates you for no apparent reason? Well there is a reason they hate you but its probably because you are just being yourself and you should never have to change yourself to please them. I tried to change myself to please my bullies by asking them to punch me - they punched but I was never part of their clan and glad I didn't end up like them. Many of my 'friends' ended up turning to the dark side of the force and bullied me to be part of the clan. They never studied and many of them started to do badly in their studies.
If you are on the end of being hated, have a look at some of the reasons above and hopefully there will be some comments of advice too which will help you deal with your situation. You should continue to focus on the things that you need to do that contributes to *your* life. Its still day one for all of us and we are always learning and growing in this game of life. Haters may initially get on your nut but should realize that they are there for a reason and that fate has made them into a piece of your jigsaw puzzle that slowly gets completed as you go through life.
Society has all walks of people and we would never be able to successfully get through life without experiencing haters and learning how to deal with them. Remember that we need haters to help us grow and that they are in your life for a reason. You must work out what that reason is and learn how to deal with them. By understanding that its most probably because they are jealous, scared or need attention will help you define how to deal with them.
What you must not do is spend large amounts of time worrying or thinking about the people who hate you. This is your life and not theirs. You should not waste your precious life on people who hate you and focus on your beautiful life that you have ahead of you.
If you are happy, passionate about what you do and enjoying the variety of life then you will realize how insignificant haters are compared to the wonderful life you have.
Soooo, the takeaways for this evening is...
- We all need haters. They are invaluable to learning how to deal with similar folk in the future.
- Haters may initially get on your nut but the more haters you experience, the more easily you will be able to deal with them.
- Learn to deal with haters but don't waste your precious life on them - focus on *your* life.
- Learn to deal with haters but never get depressed over them. Do not let them get the better over you.
- Haters can sometimes be a message from fate prompting you to do something.
- Variety is the spice of life. Sometimes the spice has a sharp bitter taste, sometimes its sweet and fragrant. Life would be boring without challenge or variety. Haters are only part of the challenges that we need to experience in life.
Nearly forgot to add that you can ind some of these pics in the Wallpaper Pool.
- We all need haters. They are invaluable to learning how to deal with similar folk in the future.
- Haters may initially get on your nut but the more haters you experience, the more easily you will be able to deal with them.
- Learn to deal with haters but don't waste your precious life on them - focus on *your* life.
- Learn to deal with haters but never get depressed over them. Do not let them get the better over you.
- Haters can sometimes be a message from fate prompting you to do something.
- Variety is the spice of life. Sometimes the spice has a sharp bitter taste, sometimes its sweet and fragrant. Life would be boring without challenge or variety. Haters are only part of the challenges that we need to experience in life.
Nearly forgot to add that you can ind some of these pics in the Wallpaper Pool.
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Lurker, and part time super-villian.
Wow... I've never experienced a real 'hater' before, just the childish ones who mocked me for my appearance. Even then I had some reputation so they tended to be hateful in private. I cant understand (even with your explanations above) why people would be so irrational to someone they've only just met, it confounds me, and quite frankly amuses me to some extent. But still, their loss to your colossal gain.
(ID #380580) Posted on 2008/11/21 19:57
None of my friends turned into monsters so far. ^^ I'm glad I made real good friends. Have no experience with haters. Perhaps one day in the future. And uhh, is it only me who thought that the blue crane(?) looks like a dolphin's tail? O.o
(ID #380583) Posted on 2008/11/21 20:02
US Navy Sailor
I do have some people at work that pressure me to do better (sometimes harshly). They lightened up a bit, but it used to be bad. When I first got there, there was someone who I believe did hate me (and even made personal attacks). Mostly because of the attention I was getting from higher ups. When I proved that I was no threat to the hierarchy, I am treated alot better. Alfa Male syndrome. Protecting ones place kind of thing.
(ID #380589) Posted on 2008/11/21 20:12
student
Danny, is there anything special at Toyosu? Is it a place that is worth visiting during a trip? I like the view of the harbour though. I'm sure everyone has haters in their life... Just that most of them don't show it or say it in front of your face. I was bullied when I first got into high school. They probably we're doing it to show off or just for a laugh. Apart from that bad start, I eventually got along with everyone in my grade. I hated their guts up until they started to approach me in a friendly manner towards the end of high school. I remember one time some annoying kid in a different grade kept saying racists comments. I wanted to punch him the face, but stopped about a centimeter from his face. I can still clearly remember his facial reaction, and he never bothered me again.
(ID #380593) Posted on 2008/11/21 20:18
CEO MIrai Inc
Toyosu is basically a shopping complex. Probably not for a trip on a tight schedule but recommended for folks who live in Tokyo.
(ID #380611) Posted on 2008/11/21 20:34
AdvDip Network Security - CCNA - Ironport - Security+
Very inspirational post Danny Definitely learned alot from this post. Will re-read again - bookmarked Is there EXIF data attached your photos on flickr? i'd really like to know what settings you put on your camera for those shots.
(ID #380595) Posted on 2008/11/21 20:26
CEO MIrai Inc
EXIF avail in the wallpaper shots only I think. P setting with ISO at 800.
(ID #380607) Posted on 2008/11/21 20:32
AdvDip Network Security - CCNA - Ironport - Security+
Thanks. Did a quick check - seems like you're on 1600 Wow, the noise on 1600 came out pretty good though. On the 400D, it comes out pretty messy/badly. Canon must've done a great job improving the sensor quality on the 450D
(ID #380623) Posted on 2008/11/21 20:51
Woah nice photos, any tips on taking photos in a night scene? Anyway on haters, everyone will bound to experience one or more in life I guess. It's just how you learn to deal with it really.
(ID #380597) Posted on 2008/11/21 20:27
CEO MIrai Inc
Look for something to lean camera against if you dont have a tripod.
(ID #380609) Posted on 2008/11/21 20:33
AdvDip Network Security - CCNA - Ironport - Security+
Invest in a unipod Lightweight and inexpensive. And much easier/faster to setup. Also can be used like a walking cane of some sort when you're lazy ^^
(ID #380636) Posted on 2008/11/21 21:09
Camera Operator. PV director/producer.
Or to beat someone trying to steal your camera.
(ID #382101) Posted on 2008/11/23 04:21
So how's the relationship with that Korean guy and you now? Or have you just shut down all connections? I'm glad my school is free of 'haters.' The only haters that we encounter are the 'rival' school down the road who like to call us names, stick the rude finger when their bus passes our bus stop. Funny how they make fun of us, thinking they are better than us, but we beat them academically by a milestone, and in recent times sport :D I don't even remember last time I hated a person. Maybe I just find people annoying but I still tolerate it.
(ID #380603) Posted on 2008/11/21 20:31
CEO MIrai Inc
This happened over ten years ago.
(ID #380610) Posted on 2008/11/21 20:33
Lover of Akiba!
Thanks Danny for share your experiences, this is just what I need now... Sincerely, thank you!
(ID #380604) Posted on 2008/11/21 20:31
Woah, that's so awesome. These photos catched really good views of this evening you had. Thanks a lot.
(ID #380612) Posted on 2008/11/21 20:35
IT Manager
I do have people who hate me but I guess it's not as bad as yours. I used to go to Toyosu Lalaport because I used to live in Ariake. There is one chinese restaurant there ( don't remember the name ) that sells TanTanMen. I used to go there and had TanTanMen. Delicious.
(ID #380617) Posted on 2008/11/21 20:44
amatuer bum
I love the photo walks Danny. I also hate them, because it makes me want to go to japan even more.
(ID #380618) Posted on 2008/11/21 20:45
amatuer bum
And after reading the long story I have to say one of your hater accounts was similar to one of my own. Years ago when I first went to College, I was taking japanese for a minor (I was planning on a programming major to make GOOD video games, so japan was a must) anyways, in this Japanese class I was a struggling hard, I could not grasp the grammar, and the class was full of nerds/otaku. ( I was only half-otaku at the time). So anyways the teacher would call on us to translate a phrase into japanese or vice versa orally. Well because I had such a difficulty, one time the teacher called on me, and I couldn't answer her. After proclaiming "I dont know" a few times, this one scrawny stereotypical nerd you see only in movies started lauing at me saying "oh god its sooo easy" out loud. Well, the rest of the class didn't think it was so funny, because I, who am/was built like the stereo typical jock, popped out of my seat, and slammed my hands on the desk and shouted something like "keep laughing it up little man, and we'll laugh it up some more afterclass". After I did that, he grimaced a facial expression that proclaimed "I think i just pooped my pants" I never found it funny to laugh at people if they found something to not be as easy as you. I didn't have the motivation to learn japanese like they did. It was just something I felt I HAD to do. Now of course I WANT to do it.
(ID #380635) Posted on 2008/11/21 21:09
Student Nurse
"It's an experience that I don't purposely choose to remember but can recall it like it was yesterday. " <-- totally empathise with that. at least you are able to talk about it now, i guess you've managed to get over it ^^; sadly, mine still haunts me and makes me cringe whenever i think about it. ahhh
(ID #380621) Posted on 2008/11/21 20:49
Student
As a quiet guy with lower than average self-esteem, I have at times attracted haters. In fact these periods of being hated tend to correspond to the moments of my life where I was weakest, eg. doing badly at school, Just troubled by problems and so on. The first half of my high school life was pretty disastrous because as an introvert I lacked social skills badly and ultimately I had very little friend. Being absent minded at that time did not help. I ended up being bullied by the entire class. They would exclude me from everything, insult my looks and so on. Fortunately the later half of high school was better as I finally learned how to make friends and avoid being picked on. However, it was a very harsh experience and to this day I'm still afraid of socialising after being rejected repeatedly in the past. Still trying to get over it. Fortunately I never really got punched or anything. ^^
(ID #380622) Posted on 2008/11/21 20:51
Electrical Engineering Fresh Graduate
wao, long reading but worthed...learn something new from this ^^ "Some humans hate you for not being how they want you to be. In their mind they have already decided how certain sets of humans should behave and when you are being just you and not behaving as they expect, they will hate you because you are not meeting their expectations. They could possibly see this as a threat to them because they don't know how to handle people who are not in their presets." >> Jigoku Shojo Mitsuganae 4th eps o_O
(ID #380626) Posted on 2008/11/21 20:55
王オタク ｘ 天才様
I found the pictures to be somehow comforting as I read this... it's like taking a walk and listening. I've been reading this blog for over a year (like I said I only just made an account :P) and I don't see how people can hate you for this. All you do is provide entertainment and information, even help, advice, and inspiration to others. Part of the reason I started a site too ^^ You're very right about the online haters in particular though. I think it makes it easy for them since they don't have to hate to your face or provide a real name or anything, it's like no repercussions. And it's everywhere: message boards, forums, MMOs. The important thing, I think, for anyone to remember, is not to hate back, but to wish them better, because it's most likely there is something bothering them to cause such an attitude. True strength is not in biting back, but in self confidence and self improvement from any experience. Anyway thank you for sharing your thoughts and inspirations yet again, Danny!
(ID #380628) Posted on 2008/11/21 20:55
No more NEET, engineering student now...
Haters aren't that much of a problem until they start being violent ^^;; From there on you might feel like taking revenge too cause they did some horrible stuff. Haters online can't really do much except flaming you. I had a few classmates whom I always compete in studying, but they're just rivals ^^;; Hating back the haters only make you feel tired and waste your time. If you worry so much about them then just go online and look at some 2D girls lol.
(ID #380633) Posted on 2008/11/21 21:03
Otaku-in-training
I can a hater or hated. I always exiled myself from everyone when I'm on 'Hater" mode. That way, I'll do less damage to my relationship with my companions.
(ID #380634) Posted on 2008/11/21 21:06
Student, part-time Haruhi wannabe (that bit about godhood etc)
Interesting boss you had there. I would probably have started laughing uncontrollably, and just make things worse=.="
(ID #380638) Posted on 2008/11/21 21:16
Nice pics dude. I hope you'll write a Christmas review with a lot of pics from Tokyo :P
(ID #380662) Posted on 2008/11/21 21:40
Mechanical Engineering student
Ah, haters. I see a lot of these people everywhere. They are like pests and as such they are needed to be exterminated like pests. There's a part in me that wants to see these people suffer, just like how they made the people they hated suffer. You have a very high level of self-control Mr Danny. I think I would act differently if I met the same people you met years ago. That Korean guy for example, if he did the same thing to me I would have charged towards him and gave him a good beating. Your self-control astonishes me Mr Danny x_x
(ID #380675) Posted on 2008/11/21 21:47
Danny... you need to write a motivational book. ^^; Once again - the amount that I feel this article relates to my life is amazing, as I read it. it really lights some kind of inspirational flame in my heart. I know I'm going to read over it again and again... I've lived with haters for a long time... mainly people who would tell me "you're wasting my life, XXX will never work", "That'll never get you anywhere" etc. At first it really got to me - but now I'm somewhat used to it, and most of the time think it's their jealousy more than anything else - so I think I'm over that set of haters. As per usual, thanks for the great article!
(ID #380681) Posted on 2008/11/21 21:52
Ah the haters theory.. first listened to it in the animax workshop.. but it is really useful when dealing with hater.. most recent haters issue i can think of is probably the korean artist suicide incident..
(ID #380692) Posted on 2008/11/21 22:00
五〇一軍团 TK8316 Singapore Garrison Public Relations Officer
Hate is a strong word. Hate shouldn't manifest unless one has done a great deal of harm to another person. usually we just get annoyed, irritated or angry at someone but maybe not to the extend of hate. anyway life is short, why waste energy hating someone over petty differences? ^^;
(ID #380695) Posted on 2008/11/21 22:02
Haters don't really hate you Danny. they hate good things. they hope for good stuff, and wishing for good stuff and it didn't happen to them and suddenly you show up having everything they wished and hoped for, so naturally they hate you because they envy you. but thats the point, the more successful you are, the more haters you got. so instead of worrying on how you gonna get rid of 20 haters you need to focus how to get 40.
(ID #380703) Posted on 2008/11/21 22:12
Helpful and great article, you raise some very good points, Danny:)
(ID #380704) Posted on 2008/11/21 22:13
Student
The only hater I remember is my systems and signals teacher, that guy is a real pain in the ass, I remember me and my friends asking him during a class how to a specific trigonometric function in matlab and the guy just said you guys are already old enough to take care of your selfs. I was like WTF?!?! I paying this son of a b... and this is the answer I get? Plus he wasn't even doing a thing just sitting with his laptop in front of him and doing nothing and we all think he takes pleasure in leaving students behind. What did I do in that class? I picked up my stuff and left
(ID #380714) Posted on 2008/11/21 22:24
Internet Media
Inspirational as always, Danny. We need haters so we can appreciate the good times all the more, right? And thanks for answering the photo settings question above!
(ID #380728) Posted on 2008/11/21 22:34
Dunno anyone who hates me that much or maybe I just chose to ignore them most of the time. True enough, I feel that it's a waste of time to hate someone, so does to "acknowledge" their hates. "yea, you hate me.. and..?", simply can't see any conclusion here. Unless they go violence, that's totally not tolerable. Agree with haters make you grow stronger, provided you know how to deal with the hates.
(ID #380765) Posted on 2008/11/21 22:57
IT Consultant
Got to commend you in holding back your temper and not going postal! When did you take those pictures? Was at Toyosu last Friday and they had some really nice Xmas decorations! Like your blog and keep up the good work!
(ID #380780) Posted on 2008/11/21 23:07
IT Consultant
Oh yeah forgot to mention that there is a excellent Dim Sum restaurant in Harumi not far from there if you miss proper HK style dim sum and not that weird japanese variety!
(ID #380783) Posted on 2008/11/21 23:11
wow thanks for the advice! My neighbour who lives one floor above me hates my family, and possibly the entire neighbourhood for no apparent reason >< A week after I moved in this year, my family started to hear strange knocking sounds from the ceiling in the middle of the night, and subsequently the knocking became almost 24/7. He's the only guy upstairs, so it has to be him; and when we approached him at first, he shouted at us and told us not to show our "f*ing faces" in front of him >_> Recently he started to blast his radio all day, and to his demise, it has affected everyone in my block and the next block. Overheard a few cheerful old people talking about it today when I went for a swim downstairs, you have no idea how empowered I felt! The estate management is finally starting to take serious measures against this unemployed chap ^^ Well, I've learnt to live with the crazy noises for a few months now, guess you're right about how we shouldn't let haters affect our lives, and concentrate on our own lives ^^
(ID #380822) Posted on 2008/11/21 23:44
Navy Recruit
very inspirational indeed and great photos like always. I was wondering when you were going to do another photo walk. I have had a couple of haters in my life and some of them were closer then I thought (my own family). I have had people doubt me my whole life always telling me I can't do this and can't do that. well they just added more fuel to my fire to keep me going. but I will leave those stories to tell in person.
(ID #380823) Posted on 2008/11/21 23:45
nice background of that photos
(ID #380828) Posted on 2008/11/21 23:49
nice background of that photos
(ID #380829) Posted on 2008/11/21 23:49
Student
This was very motivational. Thank you for writing this out.
(ID #380832) Posted on 2008/11/21 23:50
Part trooper, part -timer, 100% loser...
I don't think I've met a real life hater before, I'm pretty much accepteed my most people but I do get feel like people are talking behind my back or something... But who cares LOL Oh and the hater which got into the same workplace as you, what's he doing now? It would be funny if he found out that your success is due to him hating you... If you do meet him say this to him," I earn *bleep*yen every year, how about you?" LOL j/k~ This post is really good, it tells me that I;ve still got a long way to go and I'm still experince... Thanks for sharing and maybe I could use what you've taught in the future!
(ID #380838) Posted on 2008/11/21 23:57
Part trooper, part -timer, 100% loser...
Super typos... Let me re-write everything... I don't think I've met a real life hater before, I'm pretty much accepted by most people but I do get the feeling that people are talking behind my back or something... But who cares LOL Oh and the hater which got into the same workplace as you, what's he doing now? It would be funny if he found out that your success was due to him hating you... If you do meet him say this to him," I earn *bleep* yen every year, how about you?" LOL j/k~ This post is really good, it tells me that I've still got a long way to go and I'm still inexperinced... Thanks for sharing and maybe I could use what you've taught in the future!
(ID #380847) Posted on 2008/11/22 00:05
no need to retype the typos. i read somewhere that only the first and last alphabets are required to recall a word. middle alphabets can be jumbled and we will still read it properly. eg: soemwehre, aplhabets, mddile, jmubeld, and so on.
(ID #380982) Posted on 2008/11/22 02:49
Dog of the Country
i hate haters as they are always bullying the weak.. and somehow, i'm always trying to protect the weak =/ So, for me, i try not to hate anyway unless i really think that there's some problem with that guy (either he's too lazy to even help himself and expect others to help him or he hardly contribute to the community).. Hmm.. does that unknowingly make me a hater too? Anw: my personally experience with haters always ended up with me having to ignore them. In my term, "firewall" them. Treat them as transparent and just ignore them totally. even if they come and find trouble with you, fire them back a little and they will somehow back off. (sometimes, you might have to learn how to show your fire just a tiny little bit before they start hunting their next prey).
(ID #380872) Posted on 2008/11/22 00:35
Very nice post Danny, I'll bookmark this and show to a few friends who suffer/suffered bully. Thanks for sharing your experience.
(ID #380875) Posted on 2008/11/22 00:40
Haven't had any real haters in a couple of years...I've found that most haters eventually start failing at life (the negative attitude effects everything they do), and drop out of my radar over time...at the position I'm at now (in the military), you really start to weed out most of those types of folks... However, experienced quite a few in the past...can't be helped; just live and learn... ^_^
(ID #380880) Posted on 2008/11/22 00:46
Student, webpenguin/designer, programmer, Mac addict
That first pic reminds me of Half Life 2 for some reason…good time for a friendly reminder, don't go out into the sewers or canals late at night without taking proper anti-zombie and anti-Combine precautions to protect yourself.
(ID #380907) Posted on 2008/11/22 01:16
marvin (Registered on 2006/12/25 00:54)
reading your article and ending up n