I was bullied unmercifully as a child. First because I was white in a mostly Aboriginal school, then because my family was poor in a mainly affluent one. Having to wear hand me down clothes, never owning a bike (let alone the horses most the other kids had) and living in state provided housing caused me a lot of pain as a child. An older girl would follow me around pinching me and pulling my hair so hard it would come out. I ran away from school so many times that my Mum would have an Aunt who didn't work check by the house each day to see if I had come home. Yet no one did a thing about the bullying itself - just told me to toughen up. I think it is good that the Japanese Government seems to be at least trying to address the problem.
you know... now that i think of it, i got bullied quite a bit my years in japan. but it was mostly by the guys so i the girls treated me good, sometimes better BECAUSE i got bullied ^_^ mainly got bullied because of my size and not because i was from canada, though it did come up from time to time (i was the tallest kid in school, not freakishly tall, just won by like 2cm or so) the girls liked it, so it turned out to be the best years of my life.
Ne Danny, behaving like a child seems great to me, because one could keep his soul young for many years with such a ninpo ^_~ They say no matter how old is you are, the matter is how young is your soul.
Bullying was not a huge problem where I grew up, but then again I was so big for my age nobody really wanted to try. My brother on the other hand always got picked on by the entire school. I felt real bad for him. In the US in general, there isn't a big occurrence of bullying in schools. I think it all depends on what city you grew up in and what kind of school you went to. In college there really isn't any bullying. Maybe some name calling here and there (mostly when people are drunk). This article makes me think twice about moving to Japan.
hmmm, i havent really been bullied as a child but i can imagine it must have been terrible for you :(. in the Netherlands bullying isnt a big issue as far as i know, it happens but not in big numbers.
I've heard stories from my aunts of how my younger cousins have been bullied and battered real bad at the school I was in. she said the teachers there wouldn't do anything about it. it went so bad that they had to transfer to another school. I haven't been on that school for over ten years, but I do remember that I was lucky enough to be one of the taller and larger kids at school so bullies tend to stay away from me. or was it the fact that they knew I had martial arts class after school. lol ^^ just a tip for would be parents, Get your kids to study martial arts (even for just a little bit). but make sure to nurture them with loving care as well, so that they don't end up being the school bully in the end.
don't recall ever being bullied, mostly because i'm an all around nice guy to everyone i meet, befriending people is kind of a natural thing for me. that and i have a take no shit attitude, if you cross me, you'll be sorry. that said, i have witnessed bullying in elementary and high school. most of these cases do not involve violence but a form of ostracism. teachers act oblivious or ignore it all together, while the kids are usually too afraid to tell their parents or the authorities. this is how kids become emo...
its not a really big problem in my region ... i never had it yet in highschool because im big enough and strong enough to kick the others guy *** and defend myself but also people in the school tend to stick up for each other.. my group tends to as well i saw this mentally challanged kid got bullied earlier -the dude was kicking him or something like that- we yelled at him hey wtf you doing... guy sure backed off... well i'd guess you be afraid of a huge group of juniors... why not lawl. must have been bad Danny but at least you got a better job now and you are probably doing way better then those who bullied you... those who bullied you are probably at the mac d's back at home haha... or maybe the walmart funny when you think of it most people who bully are just jealous or stupid people...
Bullying only happened when I was in primary school, because my primary school was private school and most students is of Chinese descendant (Chinese Indonesians). But, after that, I go to public school, where most students are indigenous Indonesians, and you know, that was already over the 1997-1998 Economic Crisis, and well, yeah probably I didn't got bullied because of my parents' above average socio-economic status.
I too was bullied constantly. Starting from Kindergarten up to grade 7 or 8. It still happens every now and again, but not too much. It's still left me rather defenseless, however, and as a result it leaves me as the one my friends tease. I don't mind, as I know they don't mean it and truly are my friends, but it's one indication of the damage bullying has done. I also have zero happy social memories. I had some great times and experiences with my family, but I only ever had one friend, my 3 year older neighbour. It wasn't until Grade 6, when I was 11, that I made my second friend. The truly horrible thing about it though? Even though it's long since stopped, it still affects me. I have trouble speaking up, I have less than zero self confidence, I have generally poor relationships with all but my closest friends, and thus have never had a girlfriend.
I guess I've experienced both sides of the coin - Bullying and being bullied. Can't really remember much about the bullying part but there were lots for being bullied. Was called names by my tutors, slapped by a teacher as I was talking while walking towards the assembly hall, got picked by the entire class and almost got bashed by a group of schoolmates ^^; Didn't tell anyone though, and toughen up myself. Off Topic a little: I think kids nowadays are getting much more spoiled ^^;
I've been on both spectrums while living in America, and visiting Japan. I mean hey, what other kid has to worry about both the atomic bomb (what America did to Japan) and the rape of nanjing (what Japan did to China)? I get so much BS from people on those issues, it ain't funny...
Never really had a problem with bullying to the extent that others have had. Even though I was one of the few Asians in Elementary, Middle and High School I got along pretty well with every "class" of people you could think of. Sure I had the occasional slur/racist comments/remarks thrown at me, but usually those were by uneducated people. I was treated like a foreigner (like asked if I celebrated Thanksgiving, Christmas and other stuff) even though I was born in the US because there were just 2 or 3 of us (Asians) throughout Middle/ High School, sorta like an exotic bird.
Guess I'm also in the line...been bullied for several reasons...took some time but I managed to get past it......and Danny don't care about those questions of behaviour...I'm just a small kid trapped in an adult's body...the sad part is ...I wish I had an armour ;)
Bullying is a serious offence here in Singapore... If you're reported of bullying, you'll get a warning first... Next you get some caning and you might even be expelled... BUt most of the guys and gals here are great and don't bully but some are just jerks who take advantage of their size and bully people... Danny I respect you man! Don't ever change!
I'm surprised with the number of cases for college. Seriously, shouldn't you have matured up by now? It's really all respect in college. I had some minor problems back in my middle school days. But deep down, I know they're just idiots who didn't know how to deal with life. I'm satisfied knowing that nearly all of them never made it pass high school. Don't get me wrong, I'm not evil. But it doesn't mean that I should feel sorry for them.
worst here -_- I remember at grade 7 this kid gettin picked on alot... even by preschoolers lol ... 12 years old minus 6
Happen to me couple of times, I almost get kick out of school after get in a fight with a kid pick on me ( his dad have pretty big social stand so I get all the hammer >
NOt much of a problem where I've gone to, except if you go to terrible parts, a.k.a. "Ghettos".
Thankfully, I've never been bullied. My size and ability to get along well with ANY kind of person helped.
oh don't worry Danny, if you act all adult all the time, you'll be stressed and get all sorts of diseases. I can't say I got bullied coz even if I was called names, I didn't really care. When I got older, I usually fight back. I wasn't physically intimidating but it's a good thing I have a very sharp tongue. hehe.. Our childhood is over, we have the rest of our lives to worry about. right?!
I totally understand where you're coming from, Danny. For me, even though I lived in a predominantly Chinese area in Canada, I was the new kid that moved in, and I was small. Didn't help to have a last name that sounded like slang for prostitute. My family moved to California, and I still received some bullying cause I was still completely socially inept. Then I grew tall and fought back. Haven't received any problems since 8th grade. Now in college, I'm trying to make up for lost time, but I guess I should be studying. :p Hopefully I can keep it up once I graduate and get a job. Looks like its working well for you. Its sad though to see it start at such a young age, and the kids don't know how to deal with so they try and end it the worst way possible.
I was bullied ever since i was a child until about the eleventh grade. And I have no idea at all why it stopped then... As Triddy has said before, the effects of bullying are still in effect even long after it's stopped. (It's been four years.) I too, have trouble speaking up, and am usually shy to everyone I don't know. I sometimes stay that way. I can honestly say that in my entire life I have had and still have just about 3 very good and close friends. But through all this misfortune I can also honestly say I've gone out with three girls in the past who were KNOCKOUTS. I felt so lucky, and still do even though I've been single for a while. Well, here's looking to a bright and wonderful future!
I was really sociable up til around 6th grade then I became socially inept and was getting bullied up til around 10th grade but 6-9th grade was a terrible time for me.
Danny, I feel for you and your friends. I am an Exile. I was born in Boston, Mass. but I grew up in Canada. I got more crap than you could imagine for being an American (I was ten months old when my family moved to Canada), so I figured when I moved to the States, It would be okay. Maybe that was just wishful thinking. I moved here, and I was considered Canadian. I was an American citizen... but I was considered Canadian. So, her I am, living in America.. and I am an Exile. I welcome my brethren to join me.
I agree life is short so live it up now or you never will...well I got teased but nothing really came of it...no one really goes too far...
Didn't get bullied much during my childhood mostly because I have many friends during those days. Also, bcoz those days i'm one of the smartest in the class, many of my classmates turn to me to assist their homework, which lead them to not bullying me. In secondary school, I have many school delinquent as my friends, so of course students didn't dare to bully me. Calling names are common during my school days (everyone does it for fun), so I don't take it as a form of bullying. Maybe key to avoid being bullied is to have many friends
Wait wait wait wait.... you mean in Japan there are BULLYING in COLLEGES? Are you serious?? I mean even on both bully's and the victims, by college you'd think that both sides would be adult enough to just not care anymore!
bullying is everywhere, at work or at school. bullying here is not much of a problem compared to japan's bullies are just insecure individuals...
@Coffee I suspect that the bullying in college is more along the line of frat house hazing that we get here in the states. Thou in a dorm environment some form of bullying is bound to happen if those in charge are uncaring or unwilling to enforce the rules. And from what I have seen college kids are not that much more mature then high school kids, throw in a little booze and no adult supervision and you got a recipe for bullying to happen.
Oh yeah, I was victim of bullying on both preparatory and highschool. I still have a scar near my left eye from an incident in the first week at preparatory. As many have already told, teachers don't care, don't listen, until you react violently to the abuse. Then YOU are the bad guy, how hit the 'poor' kid, who had problems at home... I don't know how it is in other countrys, but here seems to be that students must be the physical and emotional punching-balls for those with problems at home. In high school, one of the bullies turned out to be my very first friend from when we were 3-year old. Never meet the guy again until highschool, and I was so so dissapointed when I found he was the bully that was making my life impossible.... :( And now there's cyberbullying, which is worst, because there's no way to vent the rage.
I was bullied in elementary for a couple of years, then my bully went to middle school. I still remember the guys name because it has left a mental scar in my memory. I believe I have grown up to be normal, as normal as an otaku can get lol, and have no problem expressing myself when appropriate. Sorry to hear about your horrible childhood Danny and everyone else's as well.
Bullying at my high school was not uncommon. When we did pester someone it was because they really deserved it. For example, William Hung went to my high school. He was a dork and everyone thought so. At first I tried being cool with him, helping him out when he needed, but then my buddies and I turned into assholes - I guess we were bored. We'd throw stuff at him during exams when the teachers were outside chatting it up, and there was even this one kid in our AP class that started smacking William on the face with a rolled up newspaper. It was funny to watch. If I can go back and do it all over again I'd be a pacifist. =)
I've being at both sides too and the one thing I can attest that works good is to return the hit if it gets violent. I was older and taller in my grade but I was always bottom row on PE. So I wasn't specially strong or fit. The only advantage I had was probably that everyone believed I knew kung-fu since I was the only Asian. Every bully who tried to hit me got hit back and never came back for seconds. I guess the military school policy was either hit back or we'll make you. They sometimes made me box when I was middle school and didn't know crap about boxing. The best training was my mom beating me for any stupid thing I did and she even used a log once. It is unbelievably effective the amount of pain resistance you can develop. Probably that's why I never saw much physical bullying in my elementary to high school years since all my friends and people I knew got beat by their parents.
haha! awesome. Same here! I've built up quite a tolerance for pain! (thanks mom and dad) It does help to be the only asian, too. People in my class were scared to bully me because they thought I knew martial arts.
I'll go a little further on the subject and call bullying one of the main reasons for school shooting accidents and such. I was kinda victim of bullying too... but I guess here in Brazil things are not as bad as Japan or US.. or UK. But yeah, it happens. Might get physical, might be more subjective... but I guess lots of us have some stories better left in the past. I heard some stories of brazilians who went to japan as kids (japanese descendants), and were treated awfully in school. For instance, in japan, brazilians are "burajiro-jin". So kids in school would call the guy "butajiro-jin"... relating brazilians to pigs. Things like this can ruin a person's life, creating scars that could lead to mental issues... which leads to school shootings. Depression is the other consequence. But I'm kinda glad things didn't turn out too bad after everything I went through as a child and specially as a teenager. I'm even a little proud of myself. And so should you Danny! Crappy childhood, and look how far you got! It's like we earned the right to be children once again. XD
Bullying sure does exist also in France... even though it does not seem to me so common than what can be seen in US TV shows or japanese anime. Not sure about Singapore. I was relatively spared from it, and then I studied martial arts: it boosted my confidence with teaching me respect and temper in the same time !
Hm...Can't say I ever got bullied in my life. Just teased and called racist names. But although I am a girl, and was pretty small for my age, I was the fastest girl in my elementary (bragging here!!!XD) , and I was always standing up for myself and sadly enough even getting into huge fist fights with the guys. I even protected my friends when i felt something bad was being talked about them. Hahah! Yeah...the great times of comming home with bruises under the eye, or some other place on the face. Hah hah! I look back and I laugh at it because those "not so pleasent" moments taught me to stand up and speak up so everyone can see and hear. Now that I'm a few years older, my attitude has changed in to the "Never give up, Never let ANYONE push you around, and always believe in yourself even if all odds are against you." Btw Danny-san, I think it's great that you're a kid at heart. Not many can stay a kid in heart while having a good career, a great wife, many friends and a good hobby. XD
if you've been bullying and reported to the police here, I congratulate you that you've just dug yourself a grave. There are often a number of bullyings here, ranging from the minors to the serious. Some are just classmates "playing" with each others and could just be solved within themselves or by the teachers. Of course, the serious and intense ones would go to the police. I've not been bullied and have not be a bully before. Mainly because I'm one of those "solo" type in class.
I'm sure there are bullies everywhere but here in the Philippines it's not such a big problem, at least where I went to school it wasn't. I don't remember any bullying at all actually. I know some kids called each other names and such, but for my batch at least, you weren't "in" if you didn't have a pet name. Most people just took it in stride. What's a bigger issue here is that of fraternities and serious injuries/deaths from hazing and initiations.
this is a confession of sorts. I have been a bully when i was in secondary school.There was this guy in class that many of my classmates would pick on and i joined in because of peer pressure and the need to divert attention from myself(im quite close to that fella in terms of social ranking) when i reflect on my actions now. It really makes me sick of myself for being such a horrible person. It's been a couple of years since my *dark* phase.I have apologised to him and since have embraced the otaku way of life. But in the back of my mind i still feel guilty for ruining his secondary school life.
I have been bullied quite a bit when I was younger (primary school and early adolescence). Hopefully it never happened out of recess time. I always had the chance to have a supportive mother and sister and to know about the Good and Bad in life but also to appreciate the beauty of life... Otherwise I guess I might have turned out the wrong way and paid a heavy price. Instead of turning violent (Which is the easy but worst path in life) and try to cope with pain via addiction and dangerous behavior, I mainly went for positive self-talk, patience and relativism. I however became quite cold and distant and created my own emotional armor. I have learned a lot about life, accepted myself and how this world works and matured a lot with time. I can be very loyal and give everything to those who deserve it and be very fierce to my enemies. I have yet to establish a network of true friends and give friendship, affection and love for those I deem deserving. A long and painful trial to overcome, but something necessary for happiness. For now, I am fighting for my future with the best I have. I also try not to have regrets so I don't suffer from emotional pain.
Yup, experienced physical bullying myself as one of the few non-whites during my New York grade-school years. Not so much in school, but by my babysitter's sons! I'm only a couple years older than you, Danny, but thankfully, I never experienced the extremes I've read about. (The worst I remember is being called a "Chink" by a random bus-riding kid during my walk home, and almost getting hit in the head by a snowball from a car on another walk home.) Luckily, although painfully shy, my self-esteem was kept afloat by my good grades, kickball skill, ability to draw, and a few fellow geeks along the way. Even made it to salutatorian. ^_^; But maybe I'm doing a similar thing. Reliving my childhood.
I kind of feel that if you're too peaceful and shy, you make a fine target for bullying, what happened to yours truly. I also always wondered why some people were experiencing discrimination because they tend to go their own, unique way. It is not because one decides to be different from the others and not follow the main trend that they are monsters or sort. I didn't care about not having friends. I preferred to stay away from ones only present for fun or for superficial reasons and those with the ultimate goal of getting something from you and dropping you like garbage once they got what they wanted. The only way for preventing and not being (much) affected by bullying is to show that you are an individual with feelings and inner strength. To have the necessary support, someone to rely on in difficult moments is definitely helpful in this process. Just never do something stupid out of despair as it will eat you whole instead of saving you. Thanks for reading.
I wasn't bullied when I was a kid but when I was in highschool. It made me miserable and though I would laugh with them when they start making fun of me and embarassing me in front of a lot of people. I showed them I'm cool with them doing that but everytime I go home after class I'd cry. When I went to College I started to change my attitude and my classmates just didn't bother me like the ones before. I started to not care about what people do and they just get tired and stop. In the end I learned that it's how you look at yourself that others would look at you. The more miserable I think of myself, the more miserable I become.
Had my share of bullying back when I was in first grade but that was it. :D I got fed up and stood up against those bullies...now I bully the bullies. lol. I find that they bully more those kids that seem to won't fight back, but if you do you'll see that they're not much of anything. hahah. ^^
My babysitters' little brother bullied me so much when I was growing up. On a daily basis, he'd hit me, push me down, and even one time he sat on me punching me in the ribs. School wasn't so much a problem, sure I got picked on because I was the tallest girl in class and I had glasses. Highschool, I joined the volleyball team and my picking on days were over. Hurray for sports, they equal instant popularity.
@Danny, dude, there is never any need to explain yourself to others who question your interests. Pay no heed to those emails as they're miserable people who only WISH they had something they enjoyed in their lives as much as you do now. Armor on my friend, armor on... Fortunately, I've never really been bullied. Only a racist remark once in a blue moon. Good memories and good people around me as a kid/teen. Unfortunately, it seemed all too short with all these adult responsibilities on my shoulders. Ever since school shootings started making news, there has been ads here in N. America against bullying, and also increased cyberbullying. Which I can attest to as I use to help moderate a forum/chat site. Lots of kicking and banning I tell ya.
